Disconnection is characterized by a sense of alienation, numbness, or apathy, and a lack of meaningful pursuits in life or engagement with the world. Disconnection is also sometimes referred to as feeling “lost” or a sense of “not belonging.”

This was me 17 years ago.  I had a beautiful life.  No one around me, well, most people anyway, didn’t even know what was going on inside of me. 

I was disconnected.  Going through the motions of what I thought I needed to be doing.

But when you’re truly disconnected, and your self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-alignment are OFF, this is a point of detachment that needs attention.  If you’re not able to give it to yourself, you need to find someone who can help.  If you are there, I invite you to start on this most important journey.  This is critical!!!  You think that you’re holding on for your loved ones, but disconnection from your SELF, disconnects you from those you love the most too.  You think you’re hiding it from them, but all you’re doing is keeping what they really need from you out of their reach.  It’s time my friend!  You are worth the effort!!!

Your Spirit is yearning to connect to you.  Don’t let your mind stand in your way of that connection.  Don’t let your body hold the brunt of your negativity towards yourself.  Get back into that place of true love and connect to all three!

Are you connected to your SELF?

Self-connection is a state of being… one where you are able to tune in to your own emotional, spiritual, and physical needs, and honor them in your daily actions.  When you are connected to yourself, you listen to your intuition.

Self-connection is made up of:

Self-awareness,

Self-acceptance, and

Self-alignment

Let’s define what each of those mean:

· Self-awareness: Awareness of one’s internal experiences, thoughts, emotions, sensations, preferences, values, intuitions, resources, and goals.

· Self-acceptance: Full acknowledgment and acceptance, without judgment, of self-relevant characteristics and experiences, and seeing them as a part of us and belonging to us.

· Self-alignment: Using self-knowledge to behave in ways that authentically reflect oneself and fulfill one’s psychological needs, which is having the experience of choice, to endorsing one’s actions at the highest level.

All three components of self-awareness, self-acceptance, and self-alignment are required for self-connection. For instance, awareness without acceptance could result in self-hatred or harming yourself.

Before I go on, let me also say that self-connection is different from similar ideas of being authentic and mindful.

Being authentic is only one small part of it, and mindfulness is closer in meaning to a combination of self-awareness and self-acceptance, but not self-alignment.

Self-connection is defined as an (1) awareness of oneself, (2) acceptance of oneself based on this awareness, and (3) alignment of one’s behavior with this awareness.

So how do you know if you are connected to your SELF?

Here are some statements that I suggest you consider if you agree or disagree.

If you really want to understand how you feel about these statements, go deeper by journaling about them.

1. I understand who I am and what I want.
2. It is easy for me to identify and understand how I am feeling in any given moment.
3. I know myself well.
4. I try not to judge myself.
5. When I find out things about myself that I don’t necessarily like, I try to accept those things, even if I want to work to improve them.
6. Even when I don’t like a feeling or belief that I have, I try to accept it as a part of who I am.
7. I can easily forgive myself for mistakes I have made.
8. I give myself compassion when I act in a way that I don’t understand.
9. I find small ways to make sure that the things I do in my life truly reflect the things that are important to me.
10. I try to make sure that my actions are consistent with my values.
11. I try to make sure that my relationships with other people reflect my values.
12. I am fully awake, emotionally honest, and intentional.
13. I am able to quickly pinpoint what is hurting my feelings, what kind of movement my body is aching for, when I need some alone time, and how what I’m doing in this small moment fits into my life purpose
14. I value my time and use it wisely
15. I make time for meaningful activities.

If you’d like this list so you can journal about them, just email me, marla@hunkeedori.com.  I’d be happy to send them it to you.

People who are disconnected from themselves are more likely to experience negative emotions, like sadness, anger, confusion or stress, and feel their life is unsatisfactory and has no purpose.

Many of us commit to staying in touch with friends and coworkers, current events, the newest trends, and the latest cutting-edge technology, but rarely commit to staying in touch with ourselves—our changing feelings, sensations, thoughts, values, or goals.

Committing to get to know yourself better and becoming your own best friend, may change your life.

If you belong to the group that are disconnected from yourself, (you are not alone my friend) there are ways to remedy the situation.

Simply pause a few times during the day and check how self-connected you feel. Set a reminder on your phone to ask yourself if in the last little while…

• Have I been self-aware?
• Have I been self-accepting?
• Has my behavior reflected my true self?

AND You can continue to work with me in the following ways to make a strong connection to yourself.

1: Keep listening to the podcast.  I try to share thought provoking episodes where you can look inward and keep that connection with yourself in a good place.  If you find that you’re unable to do this on your own and fall into “foggy” places more often than you feel in control of, then I suggest going deeper with me.

2: Request my “Get out of the Fog and feel like yourself again” Ebook.  This walks you through 7 steps to get more connected to YOU.  Go to hunkeedori.com/fog to get this free ebook. 

3: Come have a conversation with me.  Our first conversation is free and if it’s enough to get you in a good place, I will be so happy to have helped you.  You can email me personally at marla@hunkeedori.com and we’ll set up a good time.  If, after we’ve talked, you feel like more time together will benefit you, then we’ll figure out what that looks like.  I want you to feel hope for your future no matter how much time we spend together.  But don’t put it off if you’re struggling.  You are too important to not care for yourself in the same way you’re caring for others.  Let’s get you to a better place as soon as possible!  

Thanks for joining me here today and remember:

I see you.  I understand how hard you’re trying, and I’d like to help however I can.

Have a wonderful day and I’ll see you back here again very soon.