It is easier not to have judgement of someone when you decide beforehand how you want to act/react in a difficult situation.
It’s one of my favorite ways I’ve used the Camp Connection First-aid Kit in my life.
My First-aid Kit is full of simple systems that help me to live each day with purpose.
I would love to teach you all about this special First-aid Kit!
Camp Connection is where I teach the simple yet powerful tools that are included in the First-aid Kit.
It gets me headed in the right direction every morning.
Register for Camp Connection at hunkeedori.com/Camp
Use the code 25off to get $25 off the workshop.
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Thank you so much ClarkKentfan. That means so much to me. I know you took time out of your life to bless mine. I’m grateful to all of you who take the time to let me know something from the podcast has helped you. This helps me know what you want more of. I hope you’ll continue to share this podcast with your friends so we can all become Overburdened No More.
Judgement. I hate it when my mind becomes overwhelmed with judgements. That’s not who I want to be but I find myself there more often than is comfortable to admit.
I’d like to hope that I’m not alone in this.
I’ve been diving into some study about judgement and because I’m paying attention to that topic, I’m seeing information about it in all kinds of places.
One of the main ways we add burden to our life is when we fill our mind with judgement of ourselves and others.
Have you ever felt heavy with the judgements that fill your mind whether they are about you or someone else?
Because we have control over our thoughts, even when our mind jumps to a negative judgement first, we can decide to focus more on the 2nd thought.
We’re human.
We are created to evaluate situations and how we can survive whatever the situation is.
It used to be about how to survive an attack from a sabertoothed tiger.
Our brain was wired to judge situations. In other words, we are hard-wired to judge.
Now, just because judgement might be your normal 1st thought, we still have the choice of what our 2nd thought is and how we want to view the situations we find ourselves in.
When we judge people and events in our lives, we create turbulence that gets in our way of connecting with our best self. Don’t you think that turbulence is a great way to describe what happens in our thoughts when we allow judgement in there?
I do.
That’s one way Deepak Chopra describes judgement.
I’ll leave a link to the podcast I listened to that he shared about that.
He taught that a way to achieve inner peace and to get rid of the turbulence is to let go of the need to judge and evaluate people and circumstances as good or bad, right or wrong.
Letting go of the need to judge will enable us to find a place of deep peace.
When I catch myself evaluating something as bad or wrong, I’m trying to retrain my brain to let go of the need to label it at all.
Freeing yourself of the need to judge people or situations, allows you to let go of burdens that are not even yours to carry.
Let’s find ways to remind ourselves that we don’t need more turbulence in our lives.
I loved a talk given by Anette Davis too. I’ll leave the link to it in the show notes if you’d like to learn more from her.
She spoke about how often we judge others based on their outward appearance, their actions, or even their lack of action.
But when we fully understand someone, take the time to get to know them, we would act with compassion and a desire to help instead of adding to their burdens with our judgements.
I found myself wondering, why do I carry around the burden of judging others when it isn’t mine to carry? Really think about how you feel when you’re carrying around judgmental thoughts. You may feel better for a bit, a bit vindicated for some way you felt “wronged” but if you really paid attention, your emotional baggage actually gets heavier and heavier the longer you carry it around.
If we let others make their own choices, just like we want to be allowed to make our own choices, we would stop carrying their burdens on our backs.
Try seeing what is really going on from a different perspective and find a way to love them, however you can!
That feels much lighter!
Let love be your motivator instead of judgmental thoughts.
I‘ve held onto judgements for years of situations that I didn’t know everything about.
Just my side of the story.
I held on like it was my permission to be hurt and sad and left out.
When I finally let those judgements go, my head and my heart were emotionally lighter which made MY life so much better.
I have been learning another way to think about judgement.
I’ve been listening to some podcasts by Dr. Paul Jenkins.
His podcast is called, Live on Purpose Radio. I’ll leave his info in the show notes so you can learn more about him if you’re interested.
Dr. Paul has what he calls the Positivity Model.
One of the main parts of the Positivity Model is what he calls Evaluation.
He says that it’s a part of us we can’t turn off because it’s what our brain was created to do.
It’s what keeps us safe.
It’s always evaluating what is going on around us.
If we compare what is going on around us as better than what we are experiencing, then we tend to feel down.
If we compare what is going on around us as worse than what we are experiencing, then we feel gratitude.
If we think that worse things are coming, then we feel anxiety.
If we feel that better things are coming, then we feel hope.
The main thing I take away from this model that he teaches, is that we get to choose!
We can always see things that are better than what we’re experiencing, and we can always see things that are worse.
It’s our choice which way we want to see it.
Isn’t that cool!!!
We aren’t just victims of our thoughts. We get to be in charge of our evaluations of what’s going on.
That means we aren’t victims of our judgement either.
Yes, this takes effort and some retraining of what we’ve always done but it is possible!
Dr. Paul calls this thinking about our thinking… metacognition.
When I think about all that there is to learn out there and how much I have left to learn, I could choose to feel down and that there’s no way I could learn it all.
But it also means that I can be excited about everything there is left to learn and all the new ideas I get to discover.
I have a choice how I want to evaluate it.
And so do you.
When I remember that things take a lifetime to develop and learn, it helps take the burden off.
What’s the rush anyway?
Thanks for joining me here today and remember:
I see you. I understand how hard you’re trying, and I’d like to help however I can.
Have a wonderful day and I’ll see you back here next week.
Abundance Meditations Ep 8. Judgement/Evaluation. Deepak Chopra: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/21-days-of-abundance-meditation-series/id1558008884
Talk by Anette Dennis: https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/general-conference/2022/10/42dennis?lang=eng
Dr. Paul Jenkins: Live on Purpose Radio: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/live-on-purpose-radio/id891456190