057: I’m Embarrassed to Admit I’ve Lost Myself

During the month of August, I’m going to be focusing on the final, but in my opinion, the most important of the three pillars of creating a uniquee connection.  Connection with SELF.  There are many ways to connect with your true self, but it begins with discovering who that true self is.  We must take time to remember who she is. 

What does she want? 

What does she need? 

How can I help her?

Do I slow down during the day to give her some attention? 

Think about how you connect with others. 

Do that for yourself. 

Then, when it comes time to show up for the people in your life, you can show up as the best possible version of yourself and who they need you to be. 

You can’t give what you don’t have. 

Is this starting to make sense? 

Taking care of your needs isn’t selfish. 

It’s actually how you end up able to giving more. 

When I get caught in comparing myself with others and trying to be more like them, I’m not able to give of myself when my people need me.  I need to devote my energy into being who I am meant to be. 

I’ve become a better wife, mother and friend by connecting to my SELF.

So, let’s dive into today’s episode and learn a little bit on how to get started to connecting to your SELF.

Do either of these phrases sound familiar?

“I don’t know what I want.”

“I’ve been doing what everyone else needs and wants for so long, I don’t know what I NEED or WANT any more.”

Man, if I go by either of those as the basis for loosing myself, I’ve been lost for quite a while!

Well, truth is, I used to be there.

But I’ve made a little shift in the way I think, including the way I use my time. 

Once I discovered my top priorities, it was actually quite simple.

Have you listened to any of my episodes on discovering your priorities?

I suggest the Rocks and Sand Episodes 21, 22, & 23.  Those are really helpful.

If you go all the way back to Episode #1, you’ll see it’s where it all started for this podcast.

I’ll include those in the show notes for this episode.

I love this quote from Laura Vanderkam:

“Within your personal priorities is a little secret:  When you focus on what you do best, on what brings you the most satisfaction, there is plenty of space for everything.” 

So, what if you started spending your priority minutes on the things you do best?

  • Taking care of your family
  • Starting a business
  • Nurturing yourself
  • Making time for friendships
  • Learning a new hobby
  • Spending time outside


When we spend time with someone we love, we focus on making it quality time. 

Have you considered turning that 180 degrees and asking,  

“What equals quality time when I’m spending time with myself?”

Really think about that.

What does quality time mean to you?

Take a minute and write down 5 things you could do that would feel like a quality experience for you.

Here are some of mine:

  • Sitting in my chair, feet up, warm and cozy, and watch a show that I choose!  Me.  My choice.  And I even get to hold the remote!
  • Working in my Scrapbook Journal.  Write some of my feelings about the week’s events.  Adding photos is a must!
  • Going to lunch with one of my children or a good friend.
  • Go to a movie, by myself or with a bestie, in the middle of the day and eat movie theatre popcorn (and not count the calories).
  • Read a good book.  One that’s been sitting in my “To Read Pile”.
  • Going to the library, browsing the isles, and sitting in the quiet, reading at my leasure.
  • Going on a hike.  Not for exercise, but to enjoy the sights, sounds and smells of the mountains.

Now it’s your turn.

What would make you feel special?

Is there something you haven’t done in a while that would make you feel more like yourself?

Identify 5 simple things you could add to your calendar over the next month and write them down.

Have you written them down????

Now schedule them in your calendar.

I’ll wait….. This podcast can be paused.

Now, One Final Thought:

No other person has or ever will have, the unique blend of talents, strengths, perspective, and gifts that you have.

It’s the absolute truth.  Even our fingerprints prove that.  No two are the same.

Get out there! 

Rediscover what they are!

Discover something new!

I believe in you!!!

I know that you can find them.

I can’t wait to see what you do with this new shift in thinking.

If you want more help in diving deep into discovering your priorities, I have a very detailed process that I walk you through in finding exactly what they are in my Uniquee Connection Method.  And, you’re in luck, the program is scheduled to begin again on September 2, 2022.  Not only will I help you discover your priorities, I will help you create your life so that you are living according to those priorities.  You’ll find your voice again as you are able to say yes to what you truly want to do and the power to say no to what doesn’t fit anymore.  I’ll help you remove the things you spend your time on that don’t serve you any more and focus on what YOU want to attract into your life.  Each lesson builds on another until you connect with your TIME, your LIFE and as I said earlier, the most important connection, your SELF.  I’d love to have you in this program.  What I love most about it is that once the program ends, you have what you need to do it on your own.  You will feel that connection within yourself.  The program lasts for one month but the transformation will go with you long afterward.  Inside the program you get the four lessons and also one on one time with me to help you implement the systems taught so that you can really DO them.  It’s not about what you’re learning, it’s about who you’re BECOMING in the process.  I love the connection I make with the women in the program and watch them find who they really are again.  For me, it’s the best part of what I get to do.  I hope you’ll join me.  You can register for Uniquee Connection at Hunkeedori.com or click on the link in the show notes and description of this episode. 

Don’t forget to share what you discover with me!!

Send me a DM on Instagram.

Email me at marla@hunkeedori.com

Message me on Facebook.

Wherever we connect, let me know what you’re doing.  Let me know how you’re connecting with your SELF!  She’s missed you.

Register for the Uniquee Connection Program: https://hunkeedori.com/UCMX

Thanks for joining me here today and remember:

I see you.  I understand how hard you’re trying, and I’d like to help however I can.

Have a wonderful day and I’ll see you back here next week.

057: I’m Embarrassed to Admit I’ve Lost Myself
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